The Hand that Gives You Roses

A few days ago I was talking to my mom on my drive home from work. It was just a normal conversation between a mother and daughter. I was complaining about my commutes in the snow to Cleveland and she was complaining about her commutes in the snow from Mansfield to Butler. While we were talking, she shared a story with me that I thought was worth passing along.

Earlier in the week, on one of the really snowy evenings, my mom was driving home from work. She was getting really irritated with the woman in front of her who was driving much slower than she would have liked. Eventually the woman pulled off the road and my mom was thrilled to be able to get around her. When she got home, my mom was telling the story to Mark. As soon as she mentioned the part about the woman pulling off the road, Mark started asking questions about where she was, why she pulled off the road, and so on, all while he's walking around looking for his keys and putting on his coat. As he was walking out the door, my mom asked him, "Where are you going?" He answered, "I'm going to find her and see if she needs help." He then got in his car and drove down their very steep and snow covered driveway to see if he could help this woman he didn't even know.

This is just one of many examples that show what a kind, caring and compassionate person my step-dad, Mark, really is. Everyone who knows him probably has a similar example of a way he has shown his kind and giving heart to someone (or something, he's all about helping the animals too!) in need. I can't help but think, in addition to the enormous fight Mark has put up against cancer, maybe there are bigger reasons that he is still here. Maybe God realizes that we need more people in the world like Mark. Perhaps God knows that each and every day Mark remains in this world it becomes a better place not only for those who know and love him, but also for those who don't.

In March, it will be 5 years since Mark was diagnosed with Stave IV Melanoma Skin Cancer and given less than 6 months to live. The odds were set terribly against him, and yet, miraculously, he's still here to bring in the new decade with us. Miraculous indeed.

A bit of fragrance always clings to the hand that gives you roses. - Chinese Proverb

Celebrate We Will!

I recently realized I hadn’t sent out an update on Mark in quite a while. Mark has been doing so well that there hasn’t been anything bad to report. Isn’t that so typical of our culture? We live in a society that assumes, “No news is good news.” I always complain that rarely do you see positive and happy stories on the six o’clock news and now I'm guilty of doing the same thing.

I can’t even begin to explain what a stark contrast this summer was for Mark in comparison to last year. Last year Mark spent most of the summer in the hospital and wasn’t released until the day of his benefit, on August 10th. He spent the entire summer with either a colostomy bag or a large wound in his stomach (I’m not exactly sure how long it took that wound to heal, but it was months! I’m sure my mom and Mark could tell you). Mark didn’t take for granted his good health this summer. In fact, he took full advantage of it and set out to do things he has always wanted to do or thought he never would.In April, my mom and Mark celebrated their 54th birthdays! I know that normally it isn’t proper etiquette to make public someone’s age, but I’m sure you would agree that each and every one of Mark’s birthdays from this point is a cause for celebration! Mark was diagnosed with Stage IV Melanoma in March of 2005, one month before he turned 50. According to his prognosis from the doctors and the harsh statistical evidence, Mark wasn’t expected to make it halfway through his 50th year of life, let alone see his 51st birthday! For that reason, turning 54 was a huge milestone for Mark. The usual birthday bash they hold on the deck of their house had to be postponed due to another big event this year.

At the end of May, I married my best friend, Pat. I’m not trying to turn the spotlight on me or take away from Mark in this blog. I only bring this up because of its significance to me, and I assume, also to Mark. One of the first thoughts I had four years ago when my mom told me about Mark’s cancer and his prognosis, was that he probably wouldn’t live to see my wedding day. That was such a sad and scary thought to me. I hadn’t even met Pat at that point and certainly wasn’t thinking of getting married anytime soon. But I knew that when I did, it would be a wonderful celebration and one that I wouldn’t want anyone close to me to miss, especially not one of my parents. I will never take for granted how lucky I was to have all four of my parents there with me on my wedding day and how happy it made me to have their love and support on the happiest day of my life. I don’t want to speak for Mark, but I think it’s safe to say he was quite thankful to be there on that day and greet me with a hug at the end of my walk down the aisle.
In June, my mom and Mark had their 5th annual birthday bash! As always, a good time was had by all. The weather was beautiful and everyone enjoyed celebrating with my mom and Mark while they shared their music with us. They even did a tribute to the new Mrs. Robinson! Here’s looking forward to twenty more of these parties!Next on Martha and Mark’s summer agenda was something Mark has always wanted to do. For as long as I can remember, my mom and Mark have enjoyed watching the show Antiques Roadshow. Not only does Mark love watching the show, but he also enjoys going to auctions and trying to find his own rare gem. He’s found some interesting things at these auctions, to say the least. In July, my mom and Mark packed up the car with their antiques and drove to Madison, Wisconsin. Although they didn’t make it on the show, they had a great time on their trip. They got to attend an art festival and even meet up with old friends while they were there.
The next thing my mom and Mark did was something I never thought I would see either of them do. They went white water rafting in West Virginia. It might not sound too crazy to you, but if you know my mom and Mark well, you realize why this came as such a shock to me. Mark can’t swim and my mom is a huge worrier, especially in anything that involves even flirting with danger. But they did it! Mark wore two life jackets and away they went! They bought the souvenir video as proof of their trip, which I have watched (I needed to see it to believe it!). Sure enough, they took on the white rapids of the New River and enjoyed every second of it! While in West Virginia, they also got the chance to visit with Mark’s sister Mary and her family. Another highlight of the trip!

They ended their summer by camping at Mid Ohio and watching the indy car races with friends and family, one of their favorite pastimes and something they had to miss last year.

And last, but certainly not least, Mark recently had his body scan and MRI of his brain. The results came back “stable,” a term used by the doctors to indicate that his cancer hasn’t spread. We prefer the terms, “awesome,” “miracle,” and “amazing!” In fact, they even mentioned that some of the spots in his brain have actually decreased in size. I know that I needed some good news like that in these hard economic times and I’m sure you do too! Thank you all for your love, support and prayers. You’ll never know how very much we appreciate it!

Mark Yarman Photography

On Sunday, January 18th, there was a grand opening at the Mansfield Art Center which featured Mark's photography on the entire bottom floor of the gallery. Among the photos featured were pictures Mark took on a trip to Nepal, pictures of winter in New York City, and even a well-known picture of a hawk in flight which was purchased by the Ohio Bird Sanctuary. Many of Mark's family and friends filled the gallery to show support for Mark and his talent. To view the photos featured in the gallery, click here. If you look closely in the gallery, you might see some people you know! :)

You can also watch the video that was featured on WMFD News tonight:
http://media.wmfd.com:8000/wmfdnewsembed/012009yarman.wmv

I should also point out that before the gallery opening was over at 4:00 p.m. on Sunday, Mark had already sold two of photos! There are plenty more pictures to choose from so if you're interested in seeing more of them and/or purchasing one, let Mark know!

It's a New Year for Mark!

On December 31, 2008, Mark and Martha bid farewell to what wasn't the best of years for them. Although there were a few highlights, like the overwhelming support Mark received from his friends, family, coworkers and mere acquaintances at his August benefit, Mark spent over half of the 2008 year in the hospital or recovering from treatments and surgeries. He ended the year on a positive note, however, at his December appointment in Columbus to follow up on his most recent scans. The doctors reported that he looked even better than the last time he was there. Always preparing for the worst, new tumors or spread cancer, the report at his December appointment was the kind we pray for and rarely expect to receive. Mark is looking good, feeling good, and for the most part is the same old Mark we know and love! What an amazing thing! In only a couple short months, it will be FOUR years since Mark was diagnosed with cancer and given less than six months to live! He has beaten the odds by 3 1/2 years! That's something to cherish and celebrate as we reflect on all of our blessings at the start of this new year.

Come support Mark in another way through his art of photography. Mark's photography will be featured on the first floor gallery of the Mansfield Art Center January 18 - February 22, 2009. You can see some of his work here.

On behalf of Mark and our entire family, we would like to thank all of you for helping Mark along throughout this grueling process of giving Melanoma a run for its money. Your support means the world to all of us.

Benefit next weekend!

The Mark Yarman Benefit is almost here. I hope you plan to attend next Sunday!

August 10, 2008 from 12-5 p.m.
St. Mary's Parish (across the street from the church)
26 West St. Shelby, OH 44875
Suggested donation of $25 for admission

Please join us for spaghetti, a silent auction, raffle items, a 50/50 raffle, live performances from the bands Duff and Rathskeller, and most importantly to celebrate the life of Mark Yarman and help him with his overwhelming medical bills. **Remember - if you can't make it, you can still help out by donating online securely via PayPal with the link on the right.

Please see a preview below of a rough agenda and some of the great items up for grabs next weekend:

Lunch 12 p.m.
Silent Auction: 1-3 p.m.
50/50 Raffle Drawing: 4:00 p.m.
Door Raffles 12-3:30 p.m.
14 karat yellow gold Contemporary styled diamond pendant featuring one (1) princess cut diamond weighing .30 carats. Total gram weight is 9 grams. It is hanging from a 14 karat yellow gold chain. Total value of the piece is $800.00.
Large window hanging stained glass art piece
Various pieces of art
Ohio State Corn Hole Set
Cleveland Browns Corn Hole Set
3 Month Membership to the Shelby YMCA
8 Tickets to the Columbus Zoo
8 Tickets to Tecumseh Drama Outdoor Theatre in Chillicothe, OH
4 Tickets to Mansfield Playhouse performance of Proof (performances Sep. 5,6,12,13 & 14)
6 Tour Passes to Mansfield Reformatory
Heirloom Rocking Horses
1 night stay at the Mansfield Holiday Inn, including complementary breakfast for 2
1 month membership to Curves
$100 membership to the Mansfield Art Center
Free art class with materials provided at the Mansfield Art Center
Southwestern gift basket
Chocolate Lovers gift basket
Auto gift baskets
Beauty/spa gift baskets
Various store and restaurant gift cards
And much more!
See you Sunday!

Emily Steele
419-564-6824

--
No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.
Aesop

7-31-2008

Benefit update:

First I want to thank everyone for their overwhelming support. Each day I continue to be surprised and completely moved at how generous friends, family, coworkers, and the community have been both to me and to Mark in this time of need. I have made so many "cold calls" to local businesses asking for support throughout the last few weeks and each time I am so touched by how generous and kind people are. With this kind of support, it's really looking like I'm going to put on a successful event next weekend (even typing that the event is actually next week makes me extremely anxious!). I'm still in need of volunteers to help out the day of the event and also beverages to serve with our food. If you can help in either area, please let me know!

Mark update:

As many of you know, after an emergency surgery a few months ago to remove a mass in Mark's small bowel, they were unable to repair the bowel leaving Mark wearing a colostomy bag for about 10 weeks. Friday August 1, 2008 Mark had surgery to repair the small bowel and get rid of the bag. The surgery went as planned and Mark is thrilled to be put back together! The recovery time will be a little longer with this surgery so he will still be healing when you all see him at the benefit next weekend. I'm sure the great turnout will make him feel better!

A Brief Summary...

Thanks so much for checking out the Mark Yarman Benefit blog! I want to bring you up to speed as quickly as possible about who Mark is and his three-year battle with Melanoma Skin Cancer. Check back often as the gaps in the story will be filled in with more details soon (as time permits!).

Who is Mark Yarman?
Mark is a 53 year-old man born and raised in Shelby, Ohio. He graduated from Shelby High School in 1973. You may know Mark through his wife, Martha Fort who is also a 1973 graduate of Shelby High School. Maybe you know Mark through one of his step-daughters, Emily & Elizabeth (Betsy) Steele. There's a great chance you know Mark through one of his 9 brothers and sisters (Mark was the youngest of 10 children). Many people throughout the Richland County community know Mark as the videographer for the local TV station WMFD. There's a chance that you've come to this website and don't know Mark at all. No matter who you are or how you got to this website, thanks for coming! Mark is a special person and someone that many people know and care about.

When did he get cancer?
(the whirlwind version of the story - feel free to follow the links for more information):
In March of 2005, Mark was diagnosed with Stage IV Melanoma Skin Cancer. If you know anything about Melanoma or even cancer at that, you know that Stage IV of any cancer faces you with some pretty bad odds of survival. Because of the fact that Mark was already Stage IV (i.e. the cancer had spread throughout his body) and because it was the fastest spreading of all the Melanoma's (nodular), Mark was given only 6 months to live. He spent a lot of time researching his odds, his treatment options, etc. and enrolled in an immunotherapy clinical trial for six months. Anyone who was a part of that knows what a long and painful process that was for Mark (and the rest of the family!). The clinical trial was well worth it however, as it did exactly what they had hoped it would do which was eliminate the cancer that had spread (against all the terrible odds of doing so!). Since that time Mark has had 4 brain tumors, the first of which requiring brain surgery to remove it and also requiring a follow up treatment (which I refer to as the Frankenstein treatment as they had to drill bolts in to his head to hook him up to the equipment). The remainder of the tumors all required gamma knife radiation . Another painful process for Mark. Recently Mark's cancer has come back in his small bowel, requiring another surgery (and one more on the way in a few months). And there you have the three year update (with many, many details spared!).

Why does he need your support?
As you can imagine, three years of medical treatment for Stage IV cancer is very expensive. Mark's employer, WMFD-TV, has been very generous and understanding during Mark's various treatments and setbacks, and the company's health insurance allowed Mark to be a candidate for the clinical trial that would have been unavailable to him had he been uninsured. However, the annual deductibles and out of pocket expenses that have accumulated over the past three years have become unmanageable. Mark and Martha have been able to make it this long without asking for a dime from anyone. The time has come however, that help is needed.

What can you do to help?
You or your business can help in a number of ways. One way to help would be to attend Mark's benefit (spaghetti dinner, silent auction, 50/50 raffle, etc.) on August 10, 2008 from 12-5 p.m. at St. Mary’s Parish (in the gym) 26 West St. Shelby, Ohio 44875. Paying for admission (amount yet to be determined) and participating in the silent auction and 50/50 raffle at the event is a great way to help!

Another way to help is by locating and donating items for the silent auction for his benefit which will be held on August 10, 2008. Some example silent auction items are craft items such as handcrafted wood items and artwork, gift certificates to local stores, restaurants, spas, etc., sports tickets, amusement park tickets, books, sporting goods, the list goes on and on! Anything you would be willing to donate would be graciously accepted!). Please contact Emily Steele (contact information below) to discuss where and when to send silent auction items.

Finally, if you feel compelled to help but can't attend the event, you can make a personal donation (made out to the Mark Yarman Benefit and sent to any Richland Bank location – 85 Main St. Butler, OH 44822). You can also donate securely, using the PayPal link on this site (the money will be directly deposited in to the Mark Yarman Benefit account at Richland Bank).

Any help you are able to provide would be very much appreciated!

Mark has lived his life as a very caring and compassionate person who touches the lives of everyone he meets. Please, help us touch his life in this time of financial need. Thank you so very much!

To RSVP or discuss any further details (i.e. silent auction, how you can help, etc.) Email me at markyarmanbenefit@gmail.com.

Gifts can be made out to Mark Yarman Benefit and sent to any Richland Bank location.

THANK YOU! THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!!!